Today’s Reflection August 19

Positive Sobriety

We began to live a positive sobriety, performing acts of love to improve our relationships with others. We were learning to give, and as we gave, we received. We were achieving what none of those substitutes could ever provide. We were establishing true connection. We had arrived (SA, p. 207).

Before recovery in SA, I felt I had arrived when I achieved new things: a new car, a new house, or a new sexual partner. But despite these accomplishments, a part of me remained unsatisfied. My addiction to lust always wanted more and better. In SA, I discovered that arriving is different from what I had thought. Arriving means establishing true connection with the God of my understanding and committing to the SA lifestyle that frees me from the grip of lust and brings true inner satisfaction.

Today, I’ve learned to practice positive sobriety by staying in touch with God throughout the day. Whenever I see someone who could become an object of lust, I say, “God, thank you for the opportunity to talk to you.” I continue the conversation while removing myself from that toxic situation.

I also practice positive sobriety by making myself available as a sponsor to guide other sexaholics through the twelve steps and by volunteering to do SA service when appropriate. I perform acts of love by serving in my community, such as visiting a nursing home or sitting with a neighbor in need.

Practicing positive sobriety distances the old self-centered lust I had lived in for so long from the life I live today. Establishing true connection has completely changed my life. No more substitutes. Only the real thing!

Higher Power, thank you for helping me establish true connection.